Mindful Pauses Before Departure: Reflections on Healing and Preparation
The night’s sleep was broken, yet softer than the day before.
This morning, an old virus showed itself again — a small mark on my thigh, familiar and fleeting. A reminder of the body’s cycles, appearing and dissolving as it always does.
Rather than rushing, I chose to breathe.
To sit longer in stillness.
Some routines fell away, and that was enough.
My focus now turns to the new PDFs waiting for refinement. Annalie will begin reviewing the videos this week, giving me space to return for edits before I travel to Dubai and then South Africa. The timeline feels lighter, less pressed.
I plan to leave on Wednesday morning, but today — I rest in the knowing that there is no urgency. Only presence.
—Tarot pull—
1. Presence — The Moon
Main question: What does it mean to live without urgency, only presence?
Card reflection: The Moon shows that presence isn’t about clarity or control — it’s about walking through uncertainty with trust. Living without urgency means surrendering to the mystery, allowing shadows to surface, and not rushing to force light where it isn’t yet ready to shine.
Sub-question: Where in my life am I still rushing instead of resting?
→ The Moon suggests you may be rushing past the unknown, trying to escape discomfort, instead of resting in the mystery and letting intuition guide you.
2. Cycles — Five of Wands Reversed
Main question: How do old patterns and cycles reveal themselves for healing?
Card reflection: Reversed, the Five of Wands shows conflict dissolving. Old cycles reveal themselves when the struggle quiets, when you stop fighting against what is, and recognize that the friction was pointing toward healing all along.
Sub-question: When symptoms reappear, do I resist them or receive their teaching?
→ The reversal suggests that healing comes when you no longer resist the reappearance, but welcome it as a messenger, not a battle.
3. Trust — Nine of Swords
Main question: Can I trust that my path unfolds in right timing?
Card reflection: The Nine of Swords shows the mind’s torment — the late-night doubts, the fears of being too late, too lost, too broken. Trust here is not mental; it’s surrender. The timing isn’t the issue — the suffering comes from believing you’re behind.
Sub-question: What happens when I stop trying to force outcomes?
→ The card warns: forcing only feeds the sleepless night. Letting go loosens the grip of fear and allows rest to return.
4. Service — Strength
Main question: How is service calling me forward in this moment?
Card reflection: Strength calls you into service not through force, but through gentleness, patience, and quiet power. Service is born of the heart, of taming the inner beast and letting compassion guide your actions.
Sub-question: Where can I give without needing recognition?
→ Strength says: wherever your presence itself is enough. Service in silence, unseen, is the truest test of your inner lion’s heart.
5. Integration — Three of Cups
5. What part of me is asking to slow down and integrate?
What am I avoiding by keeping myself busy?
The Two of Cups shows integration through union—first with yourself, then with a trusted other. Slowing down lets your inner masculine/feminine, doing/being, mind/heart meet in honest reciprocity. You’re not meant to carry this alone: share the load, receive support, and let co-regulation restore balance. What busyness avoids is intimacy—both self-intimacy and relational truth. Integration arrives through simple, sincere connection.
6. Preparation — Ten of Wands
Main question: How do I prepare inwardly for the journey ahead?
Card reflection: The Ten of Wands shows burdens carried alone. Preparation here is not adding more weight, but discerning which loads are truly yours to carry. Lightening the pack is the preparation.
Sub-question: What needs clearing before I travel outward?
→ Release obligations that aren’t yours. Set down the heavy sticks of others’ expectations before the road begins.
7. Alignment — Three of Swords
Main question: Am I aligned with the seeds I am planting for the New Earth?
Card reflection: The Three of Swords brings heartbreak, but also piercing clarity. Alignment sometimes requires breaking illusions, facing grief, and letting the old heart crack open so new seeds can root in truth.
Sub-question: Which actions today carry the greatest long-term fruit?
→ The card suggests: the actions that honor the pain, rather than avoiding it. Tend the wound, for it is the soil of alignment.
